It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new.
But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful.
There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power.
Alan Cohen
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
Groucho Marx
The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.

Saturday, January 23, 2016

Dear Friend,

I am doing a test. So far it is working out the way I thought it would.
If I send an email to a "friend" .. I will get an answer . If I don't email anyone, I don't get an email from anyone.
This is not counting my son and daughter.
Just those who I routinely have written to each day, keeping up with them and thinking they wanted to keep up with me.
I have come to the conclusion that some were there for me because they felt so bad for me, so suddenly being alone and mostly lost.
I feel nothing but gratitude and love for them.
I will miss our emails. I will miss hearing about the dogs and the city and the little things that we chatted about in our emails each day. Keeping me connected in that tenuous way to the Outside World.
So to those of you who were there for me when I needed you most, thank you thank you thank you.
I will miss you but maybe you will still drop a line now and then and catch me up on things .

lots of love and thanks,


  1. I think this is how it is for the most of us.
    We keep up with each others lives and reach out after a tragedy, but then we get back into a normal rhythm of just everyday living and just as if it were a snail mail, we only make contact every once in awhile. I do think that people keep each other in their thoughts.
    Hope you got that snow, seven inches fell here, a LOT for this region :)

  2. I guess I am the oddball then.
    I send emails the way I used to make phone calls. Maybe not every day but keeping touch.
    We got no snow.
    So far :)
    I was out i the back garden watching a cloud of starlings come in and land then take off ... such an amazing sight, every time I see it I am awed.
    Stay warm !

  3. Hi Candice...
    Wishing you a happy Saturday...bright and sunny here...
    Nothing much new...
    Getting excited about going South...glad we weren't on the road while the giant storm was blowing!
    Right on our route!
    Linda :o)

  4. Oh that storm !! how awful to be caught in a storm like that on a long trip.
    It is bad enough when you are at home and one hits !
    I will be going South in a month or two .. you will have to tell me how to get there :)

  5. Mariette, I used to do that too. I learned to write letters very young because my mother remarried and we moved from California to North CArolina .. my grandparents and aunts and uncle all were left behind.
    A letter is wonderful.
    * I am and have been for a while now, a letter writer for Amnesty International *
    Letters can make a difference .. really.

    Even if you are just someone alone and missing the sound/sight of a friendly voice/letter.

  6. Awww I know what you mean.
    I too used to write letters but I also like to send postcards. Just a quick hello.
    But I have been sick since summer and only just getting better immune problems. I only sent half of my Christmas cards out. Just too tired and numb.

    You know life gets in the way of living.
    I think you might have a bit more free time than some of us. Last and this week I am dealing with the x. Not so very nice the stress coming across is mind numbing and hurt full.

    You talk about your lovely life and wonderful husband and how much you miss him. I am so sorry that you are so lonely right now ! Some of us have had a harder life and dealing with the leftovers of disaster is mind numbing. A Daughter death, my home burning down in a wildfire, a divorce and a move to start a new life with three children and two dogs to take care of.

    Last week I had a week long migraine, took thehamish to the vet for more tests, napped when the pain was too much, cleaning my studio and cleaning my closet, why am I doing that ?
    As I put Christmas and birthday stuff away I am cleaning their storage and tossing stuff. I even haven't post on my blog for over a week.
    Daughter left Tucson for her new job driving across the U.S. by herself with her dog.

    As much as I would love to email you more (of course I am not an old friend) some days it is all I can do to wake up early to feed thehamish and give him his insulin and start the 7 eye drops that I have to give him everyday and the evening insulin shot., everyday.
    I hope to be better at emailing friends and blog friends soon but right now I am trying to make order of my life.

    Sometimes you will have an ebb and flow of friends and mail. Things happen and as the old saying to get mail you must send mail. I hope your old friends can get it together and write back.

    This took me 35 minutes to write what would take 5. (Brain injury) this to show how sometimes life just gets in the way of living it !

    I hope soon you can move and be near friend and start making new friends. I know it is winter but maybe you could go to the shelter and read to dogs like your friend does ?
    It could help you being not so lonely.

    If I could send you a big hug through the computer I would.
    Be well and stay warm.
    cheers, gayle

  7. I hear you -- an am making a mental note to be a better correspondent with those I don't see often anymore. (I really needed that; thank you!)

    But at the same time, I'd offer this thought. Instead of thinking people don't want to correspond or don't care, perhaps change your expectation of how often you'll hear from them? I'm a terrible correspondent sometimes, but it isn't that I care any the less for the person I should be writing. It's just that at the end of a long day, sometimes writing something coherent (when there might not be one thought worth hearing in my head) is a challenge. I'm trying to train myself to catch up correspondence on the weekends, but I'm still not good enough at it, darn it.

    Thanks for the reminder. In this world, more and more, we need the personal communication. Mary

  8. Thank you Mary .. I try to give people lots of excuses for not being able to send a note now and then.
    But after a while.. I give up.
    My grandmother was from England and she taught me very young about writing Thank You notes etc and always replying to a letter or card you were sent. I guess I grew up thinking everyone knew those kinds of good manners. And with email etc.. there is no excuse.

  9. parsnip, I will never complain again.
    love you. C

  10. I am an incredibly new follower to your blog and your cyber-life :) but I hope that a new friendship can take flight from this! I hate it when life gets in the way of my daily to-do list, which it usually does. Sadly. I have one true good friend in my life. We have grown up together since the diaper stage. We can go months without contact and when we get together its like we just saw each other yesterday. That's real friendship don't you think? :) I am glad that there is email and texting now, although I don't know why years ago we could sit down and write letters and now there is no time in the day. Incredibly sad! But, let's march forward and look to the future - in friendship! :)

  11. If you read my blog today Candice you will know it's actually National Handwriting Day.

    I try really hard to write notes, always pen thank yous, and write greeting cards. I now find I have to stand to write anything lengthy - can't sit in a comfy position due to my back pain situation and some neck problems. It's tough to get old, the physical aches and pains get annoying, but I try hard to stay young in outlook and thought.

    We all need to write more letters and show the youth of today how it's done, they are falling far behind in these traditions - I will be trying to do more of this in 2016.

    Hugs - stay warm and safe.
    Mary. . . . . . in freezing, ice covered North Carolina!


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