My husband, the man I married when I was 21 ... died a little over a year ago.
Suddenly .. with no time for Goodbyes, or last I Love You 's .. He was there, and then he wasn't.
I was married to him for longer than I was not.
He was my lover, my best friend, my protector, my everything.
I fumble along and feed my cats and get new kittens and try to pretend that life is normal, but it will never be normal again.
This is something that I posted on another blog.
But it is a look at my life these days.
Always trying to be independent and strong and finding things to be happy about or to laugh over.. but always alone.
It is a very hard transition, going from having a life mate to being alone.
Some people manage well, others fumble along, trying to adjust.
I think I am a slow adjuster.
Nothing from the realtor who is probably not really my friend after all.
My husband would have said ... told you so.
There is this "vibe" from her .. plus the total lack of any work for my house sale, needless to say, I do not recommend her.
I always end up being disappointed in people. I think I just expect too much.
I think the least would be too much in some cases though.
The sun is shining, I have two kitties who are in warm sun comas in their little beds out in the sun room.
The chipmunks are looking in at the cats ... Look , look ! A sleeping cat ! chortle chortle ...
The flowers are blooming, there are new babies at the farm, it is super green outside ... I think I will go out into the sunlight ..