It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new.
But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful.
There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power.
Alan Cohen
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
Groucho Marx
The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.

Sunday, March 6, 2016

Sunday Morning Blues

Funny, I woke this morning feeling really sad.
It just sits on me and weighs me down.
But I keep going .. coffee, kittens, looking out the windows and memorizing the view, kittens...
I read some of my favorite blogs .. Going Gently being one of the first I read each day .. generally I can count on getting a few laughs from reading his blog. Obviously it is one of my favorite blogs ..

Today I saw an old mail in my inbox and I was happy ... for a moment ... it was from a "friend" who had been emailing with me for years .. sent me a beautiful gift in the mail after I became a widow.. someone I figured I would just be friends with for a very long time .. but it was an old mail.
I have not gotten an email from this person in months and months .. I was cut off.. discarded .. no more care from that one.

And that made me think of the one person that I figured I would be emailing, chatting, giggling and talking about dogs into Old Ladyhood ... She stopped .. one day I had no mail from her.
I wrote as usual and days went by and no mail from her.
It has been quite a while now .. she has joined the twosome of people who I was sure were Real friends, people who cared as much as I do.

So in case I am not sad enough, I can now count 2 friends lost .

If anyone else is feeling like jumping ship, please, be kind, send an email and just say why.
You don't have to stay, but don't be as mean as those two and just disappear.

The cats hate it that I am not online as much .. it means I bother them.
They can't take a proper nap now because I get lonely and go look for a cat to talk to.
Minette has coffee and milk with me in the mornings. Merlin naps a little longer.
I, at least know that I can count on them.
Now I know why there are so many of those little old ladies with cats ..

Time is moving along .. I am making sure of all the things that have to be cancelled, shut off, sent back ( satellite tv ...oy ! ) ..

I am semi-prepared in my mind for the long drive.

I should keep the laptop out and send nightly On The Road blogs ...
It will probably read something like this ...

Day two ... cats are meowing... cats are bored ... I am bored .... a lot of idiots on the road .. the hotel bed was lumpy ... cats liked it though .. I like fried fish sandwiches ... could'n't sleep last night, stomach ache ... where is Florida  ?????


  1. Are you sure these friends have abandoned you? Is it possible something has happened to one or both, maybe an illness, that prevents them from being in touch?

  2. Thank you Fran :)
    I am getting ready to go to my next new life .. moving away from here (Upstate NY) and going South, where I will not have to deal with snow storms or isolation. And hopefully a short flight to Buenos Aires when I feel like it ..

  3. I can see why you are sad. You are experiencing both the loss of the friend and a feeling of betrayal. I've recently moved to a new city expecting that the old friend I have here would help me find my way and meet new people. It hasn't worked out that way. I was sure she was a good friend. I still don't think my expectations were unrealistic, but obviously, from her point of view, they were.
    I hope your move goes smoothly.

  4. Shawn, exactly .. thank you . Strange how you can have a friendship with someone for a long time , online . email/letters and then one day they are just gone. Real life manners and kindnesses don't apply when you are online I guess.
    I will just add that lesson to the many I have been forced to learn in the time since my husband died.
    Thanks again :)

  5. Oh Candace, I can see why you would be upset. Sometimes people back away for really weird reasons like they interpret something wrong or some little silly thing. I don;t know why people cannot just talk to each other. I would be upset too.

    Definitely blog from the road as we are all going to be cheering you on your way and wanting to know how things are going.

  6. I am at this very moment looking up the stores where I can buy the right phone for blogging and calling.
    Might as well spend my money while I can lol

  7. I'm sorry your friendships have ceased to be....
    Who knows what life-changes have happened, maybe they are computer-less ?
    I had a dear friend for many years, once she retired she just became too busy to keep in touch, but I think of her often.
    What would we do without the companionship of our sweet kitties !

  8. Well, I did get notice from one person ... apparently I am no longer interesting enough to be friends with.
    So I will guess the other person is feeling the same way. I guess I was more fun when I lived in Argentina instead of the US lol .... oh well.. win some lose some.


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