It is quite beautiful .. I have never seen so much snow, for so long. Too bad I was all alone for the first huge snow of my life and too bad I had to be snowed in for most of the winter because of all that snow.
But it will definitely be a big memory .. in all sorts of ways.
My home is for sale. As usual, everyone loves it but no one has bought it yet.
There are whispers of interest.
It is both happy/sad to go through this.
The home my husband loved, that we looked for and found together, where all of my last memories of him are centered.
Making me laugh as he drove past on his new best toy ever ! his John Deer lawnmower.
The look on his face after he had raked leaves into a pile then I started picking up handsful and throwing them at him.
The revenge he got for throwing his pile of leaves at him.
The night we saw our First Full Moon back in the US ... right in that dark dark sky over our heads and our new home.
The night the power went off all around the neighborhood so we shuffled off to bed at 9 pm and he told me stories .... of his childhood, being in the Navy , living in India , living in England, his stories were always the best ... ever.
He wanted to get a cat when we were settled in.
I did too .. and a dog.
We agreed we should start with the cat.
He wanted a Russian Blue. I was fine with that.
I wonder today, after spending time here in this house, if I would have continued to be as happy , if he was still here. Or would we both have looked at each other and said, Enough is Enough .. let's put the house on the market and move .. South.
Taking our kitten with us and hoping our son would visit even if we weren't just a few hours away..
He once said that If they want to see us, they will manage to find a way.
So I remember everything he said as I still struggle with losing him and with doing things for the First time.
Today I will complete the big scary adventure of Getting My Car in my name only.
Thank goodness for kind people everywhere.
Especially, the lady at the Hudson NY Motor Vehicle Office.
So another Adventure begins .. Minette and I will be on the road again, within months, I hope.
Congratulations....keep putting one foot in front of the other. You are a brave and very thought - full woman. You would not be making the change unless you felt it right! Trust your gut. I know you do not like advice, but after being so 'isolated', I hope that you will think of that and make your next home close to a town, or IN a town or city where you can walk to the shops, to a park.... take a walk and get out of the house. Best wishes.
ReplyDeleteThank you very much patrishCE ...
ReplyDeleteToday was another First for me and thanks to the calm patient lady that helped me, I passed with flying colors. Meaning I didn't cry or fall on the floor screaming. I haven't done that one yet, but sometimes I feel like it.
Things are progressing, too slowly for my taste but I can't change that.
Minette is rambunctious today, she will need a good ball game later.
Oh, adventures...I love them! Remember that old song, I think it was called "Love will find a way"? It will and of course your son will come to visit, who doesn't like someplace warm?
ReplyDeleteIt's so nice to check things off the to do list, like the car, now you're done.
I also wonder where you will end up, it will be a kind of adventure for your readers too you know (no pressure) so make it some place good ;)
Take care.
I am really surprised that you are still encountering snow, but may be it is helping to point you towards the correct decisions about your future.
ReplyDeleteYou have such wonderful and happy memories of your husband that wherever you go those will be with you always.
Sometimes even though our children might want to see us, it isn't necessarily easy especially with the work commitments they have these days and family responsibilities. That is true of my son living in Paris, so we have to go to him, but of course Paris is not a bad place to have to go to!!!
Ooh Merle, yes, I like that song a lot ! Now I will be humming it all night long.
ReplyDeleteI wonder where I will end up .. it would be much more exciting if the decision were between Nice or Paris :)
Rosemary .. this girl from North Carolina did not ever expect to shiver with dread at the forecast of more snow.
If I had to visit Paris to see a child, I would be that mother / in law, who never stops coming to visit. I am not allowed to visit them, they come to me. No one told me why yet, I think it has something to do with me being old and feeble-minded.
Florida is looking good .. I have not gotten warm yet today .. Minette and I napped and I think she got the warmest spot.
Your post and the Cohen piece at the start of your blog spoke volumes to me. After 30 years living far from nowhere on a farm near my husband's hometown, I want to leave and start anew. He will never leave. I won't go into it all, but I fear the clock ticking daily and the need for change before it's too late.
ReplyDeletedonna , I was lucky, my husband was an adventurer, he lived in Italy, Paris, London and India before I ever met him. I have been to many places myself but he was a total adventurer and open to everything. I admired him so much.
ReplyDeleteI grew up in the countryside in NC.
I left when I was able to .. I haven't been back.
I hope you are able to figure out how to keep everything you hold dear and still be able to live the way you would like to ... write any time if you want to hash out ideas or just talk. good luck !!
I came home caught up in unproductive ruminations about an unpleasant counterparty in a negotiation at work who yelled at me and hung up the phone today, and turned to my iPad to distract my brain. And there was another picture of snow on your website.... Thank you for your posts, your honest contemplations and congrats on the DMV success (you cannot imagine the Chilean version of such bureaucracy...). If I could send you some of our unrelenting hot weather, I would. Here in Santiago, we re all longing for fall and relief from the heat. I hope that crocuses and daffodils are soon to appear in your neck of the woods. Laurie
ReplyDeleteLFitz .. if Chile has red tape galore like Buenos Aires, I probably know what you mean :)
ReplyDeleteAt least today it did not snow and there is mostly only grass showing in the yard.
As to having a car in Chile, I was content to rely on taxis in BA .. driving there was beyond my ambitions .. I wanted to live longer . . my chances would have been lessened greatly if I had tried to drive in Argentina :)
Sending you congratulations on the car thingy - you always manage well because you are one smart lady Candice. I'm keeping fingers crossed for a sale soon and you finding a happy place to move to with Minette.
ReplyDeleteI was just in D.C., loving the celebration and the memories from when we lived there so long ago, but know I could never live there, or any major city again. It was too crazy with the traffic and no parking!!! A nice mid-size town would be good for you - within walking distance of public parks, shopping centers, coffee shops etc.
Easter blessings my dear…..with sunshine I hope.
Mary X