It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new.
But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful.
There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power.
Alan Cohen
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
Groucho Marx
The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.

Tuesday, December 5, 2017

This 'n That

11:00 pm, Tuesday night , the cats are in bed waiting for me to come and turn off the lights.
I am tired but restless.
I have all these ideas and plans running around in my head and no one to discuss them with, the cats fall asleep as soon as I start to tell them .. sheesh.

It is getting chilly in North Florida .. I like that .. it feels a bit more normal.
I keep forgetting what month it is .. this sort of weather is not the middle of Winter , not Winter as I know it.
Summer was nice .. Fall.. nice ... Winter ? nah .. I am not complaining, just remarking on the huge difference . And yet ... I miss New York, I miss real Winter, I miss getting ready for Thanksgiving when the trees are losing leaves and it is chilly, getting ready for Christmas when it is cold and wondering if it will be a white Christmas .. or just a flurry ..

I am more isolated here than when I lived in NY.
I am alone as much or more than when I lived in NY ..
This is not a complaint, this is just what happened .. I left NY to be away from snow and utility bills and being alone.
I live where the utility bills are the same, I am isolated and I am alone.
Don't tell the cats I said that .

So now more decisions have to be made.
There have been some real disappointments .. people I never expected to treat me in a nasty hateful way, shame on that person , my daughter is a champion .. she has been so very thoughtful and helpful and caring ..
But she has her own life and home and a new puppy .. ( adorable does not describe it ) ...

I am feeling more like finding my own life again .. where I want to be, doing something more than sitting here day after day ... if I get to live so long, there will probably be a day when I will sit and do nothing all day long .. but for now, I would like to do some Living ... around People ...

I am not going to get lost finding a mall here, so I am shopping online for presents ... it is nice.
I like shopping this way ..

For myself as well, Sephora is one of my favorites .. Amazon, music, books ... even gardening websites .. and I never have to deal with crowds and traffic .. online shopping is a Good Thing.

What are your Good Things ?
How are you managing the holidays this year ?
Are you staying home ?
Do tell ...

5 comments:

  1. I didn't say anything before, but my sweet 15 1/2 yr old dog Emma passed away suddenly a couple of days ago. It has been hard :( And then today I got a worrisome mammogram result, and have to go back in for more tests. So not the best lead-up to the holidays. I'm buying every gift online, and will do the neighborhood Christmas home tour on Saturday, hopefully get into the spirit a bit...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh how very sad and yes, a bad time of year for such a heartbreak.
    Bless her heart, almost 16 years old ! A well loved good girl.
    My sympathies to you and your family.

    ReplyDelete
  3. liparifam .. I thought I had your email address and wanted to send you a good luck note but I will do it here instead .. I don't have your address.
    I will be thinking good thoughts for you !!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thank you! My other two dogs are 13 and 11, so no spring chickens around here! Well, except for my 2 yr old granddog :)

    ReplyDelete
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