It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new.
But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful.
There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power.
Alan Cohen
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
Groucho Marx
The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.

Sunday, March 12, 2017

Looking back with love

Sunday in Buenos Aires ..
My husband and I would dawdle over coffee, he would have his scones that he loved from a bakery nearby .. he read the NY Times online and I generally slept later, he brought me my coffee in bed and the dog would decide when I had to get up ..... and feed him .... and then we would all go to the park for a walk.

This park was a couple of blocks from our home. This was our "backyard" ... we all loved it.
I spent every morning and a few hours in the afternoon, with them, in this park .. which stretched on for miles. Museums, Ambassadors residences and homes .. all along the Avenida and this was part of our home ! We lived there !!
I look at these photos now, I remember just about everything about those days and I still have to shake myself and remind me, it's true, you did live there, you and your love and that sweet wonderful dog , were a family living in Buenos Aires Argentina.

It seems like a story I read in a novel a long time ago.
I feel so removed from all of it.

I am the only one left , of that threesome.
I don't want to hear anyone tell me, you can't go back, it won't be the same ... as if I am a moron ..
But the city is still there. The parks and the people are still there ... we left, they didn't.

I need one last visit, we always said to each other that we would go back again ...

You plan and you plan, then Life happens.
which sadly was the End of a Life happened and that changed my Life too .. forever in so many ways.
But I have tried to be smart and do sensible things.

Moving to Florida seemed smart.
I am only more lonely.
I am not saving any money, I am in a too expensive posh condo that is better suited for a family. 3 bedrooms ? 3 bathrooms ?? Really ??

I want to return to my home, the place I have lived longest, where there is family, friends and possibilities..
I wish it were Buenos Aires ...

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sunset in Buenos Aires